A heartbreak is never easy.

After every breakup, it always feels like the world is crashing in on me, and in a way, it feels like I lose a part of myself. As I begin to ponder and am able to organize my thoughts, I now realize this is why:

1) I shared so many memories with this person.

Sometimes there are memories that you create with your partner that just can’t be recreated with someone new. There is something so meaningful in the memories that I created with him that wouldn’t make sense to do with someone else.

For instance, a restaurant that he and I always went to became our favorite. It wouldn’t feel right to bring someone new to the same restaurant because it was “our” thing. Maybe as years go on, it wouldn’t matter anymore, but as emotions are high after a breakup, strong feelings linger when you revisit a place you once both loved.

The memories can’t be replaced.

2) He became my best friend.

Even if I don’t feel like he fit the word “best friend”, in the end, if I really think about it, he truly did become my best friend. I would tell him almost everything. He would be the first person to hear about all of my goals and dreams, struggles, and accomplishments. If I had a good day, he was the first to hear about it, and vice versa for a bad day. He was the person I was most comfortable with, and he had seen all of the good and bad in me. And in spite of the bad, he loved all of me.

To lose that best friend to that I told everything, I then lose that sense of having someone who I can share all of my good and bad with.

3) I lost someone who would be there for me in a heartbeat.

No matter what the circumstances were, he would drop anything to be there for me if I was in trouble. And I know that because he has shown me many times that I was his number one. He always gave me the security that he would be my backbone. I never had to question who I could call because I knew it was him.

So yes, to lose someone willing to be your backbone, you now question yourself, who will I have left that is willing to be my backbone as much as he was?

The answer?
No one, but myself.

4) The future I had in mind no longer exists.

I grew a love for someone I didn’t expect, and as that love grew stronger, I began to envision a future with him. I saw him as my husband, the father of my children, and the man I would end up with for the rest of my life. He became part of my end goal.

To have that vision stripped away is probably the cause of feeling like it’s the end of the world because now, where do I go from here?

The future that I thought I was going to have is gone just like that in a snap of a finger.

CONCLUSION:

Whether you are the one who broke it off or you are the one taking the hit, it is not easy to be on either side.

You could argue that one person has it easier than the other, but ultimately you are both losing someone who was dear to your heart.

If you are currently going through a breakup and feel like it’s the end of the world, do not worry! You are not the only one. The future you had in mind is stripped away, but that cannot stop you from creating a new life. You may feel like you have to start from square one again, but that is the beauty of life. You can always start over!

Keep in mind, that time does not stop for you.

It’s okay to allow yourself to feel the hurt and grieve on the pain, but keep it to a max of ONE week.

Then after that, get back on your feet and start planning a new life that you desire!

So even though the world is crashing in on me…..

I know that it is my time to move along.